Ok, so I was trying to go back and put everything in order from the beginning, but I have to interupt for a quick side note.
I have been crying for two days now because tomorrow is the day that I have been dreading for 12 weeks....the day I go back to work! UGH!! It is a combination of leaving him and the fact that he is growing at lightening speed. Everyone always says that they grow up quickly...and it is so unbelievably true! After going back through all of these pictures and emotions...I realize how much he is changing. At 12 weeks, he is able to bat both his hands and feet, "talk" (nonstop), to us and to his toys (the ones with eyes), sit in his bumbo for a short period, laugh (my absolute favorite!), splash in the bathtub, and hold his head up really good. He is just starting to sit in the exersaucer/jumperoo and actually seems to enjoy the toys. Such a smart kid!
Anyway, back to the point...I know that I am fortunate enough to be able to have my mom keep him and to only be going back part time BUT I still am so upset about it. I don't know how it is going to go, but it is not looking too good. I know that I can't stay home all of the time but I sure would love to. I have even offered to sell our house or my Volvo to be able to stay home more (got a big no on that one!). Some people say they liked going back because they got bored and needed to get out....I never have been bored at home...NEVER! We have always found plenty to do. We have had our little routine that we are both comfortable with. I have been happy to wake up EVERY morning! I love seeing his smiling face...such a precious gift from God! I wake up, feed him, we go back to sleep for 30 mins to an hour, and then get up to start our day. It has been fantastic! I can honestly say that the past 12 weeks of my life have been "happy". It is the only time I can remember consciously thinking almost every day..."THIS is happy " and "I absolutely LOVE my life". I just don't want it to end!! I know he will be fine and in time, I am sure I will be too. But for now...I am sad, very sad.
I am LOVING your blog!!!
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I can SOOOOO relate to almost every single thing you mention. I am so glad you are enjoying motherhood!
Oh Amanda! As I read this post, my heart was aching for you! I know the love you have for your son, and I can just imagine the heartache you're feeling. I don't know your personal situation, but if it's really what your heart desires and what God has called you to, go for it! Be honest with your husband about how badly you want to be home if that's what you want. Sacrifice whatever you have to because your son is worth it! You've already seen a little how quickly he's growing and trust me, it only goes faster! I LOVE being home too, not once do I ever get bored. I love being little miss susie homemaker. Still thinking about you and if you ever wanna talk, just message me!
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